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Calia Read breaks the mold in this explosive novel that grabs hold and doesn’t let go until the shocking truth is revealed.
One kiss can change everything.
One month ago I was admitted to a psych ward. Yesterday, Lachlan told me I’m losing my mind. But I know what I saw. Will you believe me?
Behind the walls of a mental hospital, Naomi Carradine feels her world breaking to pieces. She’s starting to believe all the voices questioning her sanity. Only visitors from the outside world keep her tethered to reality. But deep in her thoughts, Naomi is haunted by memories of a golden summer that twisted into a waking nightmare of obsessive love and fractured truths.
Just home from college, Naomi moves in with her best friend, Lana, the daughter of a Virginia senator. At a lavish party thrown by Lana’s father, Naomi meets a sexy stockbroker named Max and finds herself unable to resist his charms. One fiery kiss and she’s going back for more, beginning a terrifying descent. Having witnessed the unspeakable, Naomi has only one hope of escape: unraveling the devastating secrets of her past.
Unravel is intended for mature audiences.
Praise for Unravel
“A sexy, mysterious, and enthralling story . . . Calia Read’s words are so captivating, they’ll hold you hostage and throw you into loops you’ll never see coming.”—Claire Contreras, author of There Is No Light in Darkness
- Sales Rank: #74544 in Books
- Published on: 2014-08-26
- Released on: 2014-08-26
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .70" w x 5.20" l, .81 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 336 pages
Review
“A sexy, mysterious, and enthralling story . . . Calia Read’s words are so captivating, they’ll hold you hostage and throw you into loops you’ll never see coming.”—Claire Contreras, author of There Is No Light in Darkness
About the Author
Calia Read is the author of Unravel, Breaking the Wrong, and Every Which Way. She lives in Germany with her husband and their four kids.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
1
BREATHE ON GLASS
I gaze out the window at thousands of snowflakes fluttering to the ground. I press my face against the pane, aching for freedom. But it isn’t a thin layer of glass that’s blocking me from the outside, it’s the truth.
Most people believe the truth is a delicate little bird. They think it’s harmless.
But I know something they don’t.
If they dare to move their hands away from their body, they’ll discover that the little bird is gone. It’s torn their skin apart and traveled to the core of their soul, right where it hurts the most.
And that’s why I’m here and they aren’t.
I press my forehead against the window and breathe on the glass. Mist forms and my tally appears. I put another mark on the glass. Thirty days.
Thirty days since I’d been involuntarily admitted to Fairfax Mental Health Institute.
Seven hundred and twenty hours of opening my eyes every morning to an unfamiliar room. Seven hundred and twenty hours of having nurses coming in and out of my room every hour. Seven hundred and twenty hours of being monitored around the clock like I’m a toddler and can’t be trusted.
I watch a fly moving across the window, frantically trying to find a way out into the world.
“I’ve already tried, dummy.” I tap my finger against the window. “They have these suckers bolted tight.”
The fly stops moving, as if it can hear me. Sooner or later, it’s going to find a way out. I feel envy, thick and powerful, flow throughout my body. I want to slam my palm against this insect, killing any chance of its escape.
This is what my life has been stripped down to. I’m envious of a fucking fly.
Loudly, someone knocks on my door.
One, two, three . . .
Three is the magic number for my nurse. It’s as if those few seconds will allow her to brace herself for what she’ll discover on the other side.
Mary stands in the doorway. I take in her short brown hair and colorful scrubs. “You have a visitor,” she says.
I move away from the window. My heart beats the same monotonous rhythm every day, but in seconds it speeds up. The tone sounds different. It isn’t dull. It’s interesting and new and exciting. It’s beautiful. And it can only mean one thing.
Lachlan Halstead.
Before I leave the room I look over my shoulder. The fly’s gone.
“Lucky,” I mumble under my breath as I walk out of my room.
Anyone who ever doubts whether madness exists need only look right here. It drifts throughout every room. It slides down the sterile hallways and attaches itself to every patient, stripping them of their hope and covering them with despair.
Some people don’t react. But the ones that do, scream. Their shouts echo throughout the building. The nurses run down the hallway and a few seconds later those screams turn into moans and then stop. When I first arrived, those screams sent a chill down my spine. But now I’m used to it.
As Mary and I walk down the hall, a nurse and a brunette patient pass by. My steps get slower. I stare at the brunette. Her hair is cut short. Her skin is pale, but underneath the fluorescent lighting its tone takes on a yellow hue. Her body is emaciated. There are track marks all over her arms, telling their own story. She meets my gaze. Her soul shines through her eyes, and asks, “How the hell am I still alive?”
I have no answer.
Mary stops at two locked doors. She enters a four-digit code and the doors slowly open. It’s like we’re entering hell. The rec room is the most depressing place in Fairfax Mental Health Institute. This is where everyone is shoved together.
Mary pushes me forward. The blinds are open, letting sunlight pour in and making the tan linoleum floors blindingly white. Tables are spread throughout the room. A few people are sitting down, playing board games or watching the television mounted on the wall. The news plays so softly the captions are on.
But most people do nothing. They stare straight ahead, their eyes vacant.
There are so many minds around me that are wasting away. But I have someone that keeps me coasting above insanity, and he’s only a few steps away from me.
My body relaxes as I watch Lachlan. He’s sitting at a table next to the windows. His thick brows slant low as he scans the outdoors. His tan hand reaches up and loosens his dark blue silk tie. His brown hair is still cut short, with a few strands brushing his forehead.
If I blink, he’s just a boy with a cocky smile that comes from a child’s naivety. Wiry frame. The best friend that stole my heart. When I open my eyes that image disappears, and in front of me is a man. His cockiness has evaporated into experience. His body has filled out. And now, not only does he own my heart, he possesses my soul.
He’s always been an extension of me, and you cannot be that close to someone and expect your pain not to spread. I know that my sadness is his sadness.
I move across the room. Lachlan is still looking outside. I squint my eyes and follow his gaze to the naked tree closest to the window. It’s the same tree I always look at. Its branches have been stripped of their leaves and bow from the cold wind. For the last week, I’ve watched a frozen water drop on one of the lower branches. It hangs there, looking ready to fall.
The weak branch sways in the air, but the water drop remains. If the ice drop can hold on, then perhaps I can hang on to my small bit of sanity.
I pull out the chair across from Lachlan.
His eyes meet mine. It’s a shock to my nerves. My blood rushes straight to my head.
“How are you?” he asks.
My feet rest on the edge of the seat. I place my chin on my knees, refusing to look away from him. He visits frequently. But those visits seems to stretch farther and farther apart.
“I’m the same as two days ago,” I say.
Lachlan stares at me levelly. His eyes are sharp. They miss nothing. “Have you been talking to your doctor?”
I look out the window, away from his gaze.
An exhausted sigh escapes him. Lachlan drags his hands through his hair. “I miss you, Naomi.”
“I miss you too.” My voice cracks.
“You know you don’t belong here, right?”
I nod.
“Then you need to try and get better.” Lachlan looks around the room like he’s watching a circus. His jaw hardens. “It fucking kills me to leave you here.”
I reach across the table and place my hand on top of Lachlan’s. His eyes become hooded as he looks at it. He turns his hand over and his fingers move across my wrist, making my skin burn. With his palm faceup, he swallows my hand in his own. “You love me?”
I look Lachlan dead in the eye. “You know I do.” My words should have given him hope, but now he just looks deflated. “If you love me, then you need to get better.”
“I’m trying,” I insist. I try to move my hand.
Lachlan’s grip tightens. “No, you’re not.”
“I can’t ignore everything that’s happened,” I say in an intense whisper.
He leans in, his face inches from mine. “I told you I wouldn’t stop fighting. I told you that you weren’t in this alone, and you crumbled.”
I jerk my hand back. He lets go. I can handle a lot of things, but hearing those words come out of his mouth feels like someone has cut a piece of my heart off.
He stares down at the table, where our hands were once intertwined. “This is destroying you,” he murmurs. “The Naomi I know would have never just given up so quickly. She would have fought to stay in the present.”
“I am fighting. Look around you, Lach,” I say. “How do you think I’ve lasted this long here?”
“You know why you’re here?” he asks sharply.
I don’t say a word.
“You’re here because you fell apart.”
I flinch because, true or not, I can’t go up against Lachlan’s words. He’s going to come out as the sane one. His words will make sense before mine ever will.
My heart thunders in my ears, and my vision blurs. I see a woman with sad eyes, staring at herself in the mirror. And I see Max lying beside me in bed. In one quick move I’m above him, and he smiles up at me, his hands gripping my waist.
And then the image disappears. I groan and press the heel of my hands into my eyes.
“Naomi, look at me.”
I lower my hands. Lachlan sits across from me, staring at me intensely.
His hand is around my neck. His thumb brushes across my skin and my body jolts.
“Are you with me right now?” he asks.
Yes . . . no . . . maybe. Every day is an unknown for me. Every day I wake up feeling like I’m surrounded by a heavy fog and I know I’m missing a piece of myself, and I don’t know where it is.
I answer Lachlan honestly. “For now I am.”
There’s a two-second pause as he looks me in the eye. A pause that makes my stomach twist and my blood roar through my veins. His mouth opens, but nothing comes out. He looks like he’s battling his feelings, but I watch as he loses. His eyes lock with mine and then he kisses me hard on the mouth.
Instantly, I come alive. And that’s what a good kiss should do. It should speak to you the second your lips connect.
You don’t think.
You react.
You feel.
For Lachlan and me, it’s always been this way. All I can hear from this kiss is, “Remember me. I’m real.”
I respond the only way I know how, the way Lachlan showed me in the past. His hands hold my face in place. The pressure of his lips declines when I move my mouth against his. He makes a noise and grips my face tighter. It triggers memories of who I used to be. Behind my eyes, memories start to play on a projector. Each one has Lachlan. The two of us in a field, lighting rockets. Staring at the stars and talking until the sun comes up. I see myself smiling and carefree and so happy.
For a brief moment, I feel at peace. Lachlan’s tongue slips between my lips. A shudder moves through me as I open my mouth wider. My fingers move up his arms, toward his neck. Just when hope starts to flicker in me, Mary clears her throat.
Lachlan pulls away first. His pupils are dilated; his lips are swollen from our kiss. I lick my lips, trying to get a piece of that kiss back. Mary clears her throat louder this time. I glance up.
“Mr. Halstead,” she says, “I think it’s time for you to leave.”
He removes his hand from the back of my neck. My skin instantly feels cold. My arms drop heavily onto the table as I watch Lachlan stand up.
He looks at Mary. “Give me just a minute,” he says.
Mary’s eyes move between the two of us. She sighs. “One minute,” she warns, and walks away.
Lachlan leans close to me. I keep my gaze on the table, but the smooth surface starts to blur as tears pool in my eyes. Something terrible is brewing. I can feel it.
“I can’t keep doing this,” he says.
I look at him. I see the pain in his eyes. “I need you to visit me,” my voice cracks. “It’s the only thing keeping me going.”
Lachlan looks out the window. My fingers reach out and I grip the collar of his shirt, forcing him to look directly at me.
“You can’t leave me.”
A tense silence wraps around us. He looks at me through his eyelashes, his expression grim. One by one, his fingers wrap around my wrists. Firmly, he pulls my fingers off his shirt.
“I’m not leaving you. That’s the last thing I want. But I don’t think I’m helping you. I think I just make everything worse,” he says slowly.
“You help me,” I insist. “Whenever you visit things are better.”
Lachlan says nothing.
“You’re just having a bad day. I’m having a bad day. Tomorrow things will be better, and—”
His head turns. I see the look in his eyes. It doesn’t matter what I say. He isn’t going to change his mind.
Everything around me has been a chaotic mess, yet he has stood firm. And now he’s shredding my world.
This must be what hell feels like. It has to be. My lungs are constricting. I can’t breathe. I rub my eyes with my palms, moving my head back and forth in denial. If Lachlan stops coming, I’m afraid of what will happen. My sanity is being held together by a threadbare string. I’ll break before that frozen water drop does.
Feeling his hand on my shoulder makes me shake. He squeezes once. I force my hands to stay on the table.
His hand drifts away. There Lachlan goes, walking out of my life.
I turn in my chair. “Wait!”
Lachlan turns around.
At this point, I’m desperate. I know I’m losing him. “Do you remember what you said to me a year ago?” I ask.
His jaw tightens. He looks away and I know he’s trying not to respond to my question, but he can’t help himself. Even when you’re angry, love tugs at your soul in the most painful way. It makes you care—makes you feel—when that’s the last thing you want.
He nods stiffly.
“Then, please, don’t do this,” I say.
He steps forward.
“Lachlan,” Mary calls out behind him.
He stops.
I plead with my eyes. Seconds pass and I think he’s going to tell Mary to fuck off. I think he’s going to say he didn’t mean what he said. But he slowly backs away.
The world rips out from under my feet. I’m in a free fall, frantically trying to grab onto anything that will save me.
Lachlan’s figure starts to become hazy. My skull feels like it’s been cracked in half. I grip the table and slump forward. Tables and chairs disappear into thin air. The walls crack and shatter to the floor. New walls, the rich shade of brown, burst from the ground. The tan linoleum floors fade into plush, white carpet.
The windows shatter around me. A cold gust of air bursts into the room. I curl my fingers around my head and moan. Shards of glass rotate through the air. They miss my body by inches before they disintegrate. A large window fits into the wall with a loud suction noise. Sunlight fades away, replaced by the soft glow of moonlight.
Then everything stops.
Most helpful customer reviews
83 of 93 people found the following review helpful.
MIND FREAKING BLOWING!!!!
By The Little Black Book Blog
"Just remember that even the purest of souls have darkness in them. It might be hard to spot. Perhaps they've perfected the art of covering it from the world. Or maybe it's hidden in a dark corner of their mind. But it's there."
Upon finishing this book at 4am three words came to mind "Holy. F***ing. s***". Yup folks this book blew my mother effing mind!!!! And I mean totally and completely mind-f***ed me, goosebumps up and down my arms, jaw hanging open. Hours later the details of the plot stayed with me and ran through my head until I fell asleep. To say I have a book hangover would be an understatement.
At the start of Unravel, for reasons unknown to her, the main character Naomi has been admitted to a mental institution and she is extremely lost without anyone to believe her story. Through therapy sessions with her new doctor and flashbacks, her shocking story quite literally unravels until the very last page leaving you in absolute awe!!
I cannot tell you too many details of the story because there are so many hidden layers that must be peeled back as you go, but I can tell you a little bit of what you're in for:
"Anyone that has the power to open up your heart without you even knowing, should terrify you."
1. A beautiful, sexy and conquering all - even the mind - love story. Naomi has not one but two equally lovable men who are there for her in different parts of her life.
There is Max - strong, assertive and extremely sexy businessman who has a sexually charged magnetic pull with Naomi from the start.
"His eyes lock with mine and then he kisses me hard on the mouth. Instantly my soul wakes up. And that's what a good kiss should do. It should make you come alive. It speaks to you the minute your lips connect. You don't think. You react. You feel."
Then there's Lachlan - kind, caring and gentle, Naomi's childhood crush, her best friend, and first love who supports her through everything. If you're thinking "love triangle?", no that's not what I'm getting at here. You just have to read to find out how it all plays out between Naomi, Max and Lachlan.
2. Next on the list is a plot that will blow you away! There are so many shocking details within the book that tie together flawlessly. You may be confused for a while but it all leads up to an epic realization that will have you contemplating every detail until the wee hours of the morning.
3. Some seriously steamy sex scenes!!! Holy crap these were hot!! They were different each time, necessary and very intimate...and yes I was fanning myself, panting and simultaneously swooning.
"God offers to every mind its choice between truth and repose. Take which you please - you can never have both."
4. Amazing writing!!! I think I was a little bit highlight happy while I was reading. I just love how Calia Read writes!! If you have not read one of her books yet, I highly recommend it!!! She's a fantastic and captivating writer and this book was no exception.
5. A minor adult content warning. I would probably define this book as a psychological thriller romance. It sort of had a 'Girl Interrupted' feel to me but with more romance elements at play. Fair warning: There is some discreet but disturbing rape content in the book. I don't want to sway you away from reading it but if you are easily disturbed by this type of content, then I urge you to proceed with caution.
If I could put up a 10 star rating I would!! It's early but I'm pretty sure this is a new 2014 favorite! I know there has been a lot of anticipation for this release and I can confirm that it is rightfully so!!! If you've made it this far through my rambling, I encourage you to now stop what you're doing, head over to Amazon, one-click this baby and start reading right away because this is a book you will not want to miss out on!
22 of 22 people found the following review helpful.
A unique mind bender
By Misha
This is the kind of book designed to make your head spin, and Calia Read definitely delivered in that department. I'm still feeling a little off-kilter after finishing Unravel this morning. The fun thing about a book like this is going back through the scenes in your mind after you learn the truth and seeing how all the details fit together and what the clues were that could have pointed you in that direction.
I will say that around the halfway mark in this book I was pretty sure I had figured out part of the story (and I was right). I don't think it impacted my feelings as I finished the book, however, since there was another part to the story that completely blindsided me. I loved that moment when my jaw dropped and I yelled "No way!" Not only did that twist surprise me, but it also resolved a struggle I was having with the romantic relationships in the book. That made the conclusion even more satisfying for me.
What I enjoyed the most about this book was the guessing game in my head. As I read each chapter I couldn't stop wondering how and why Naomi ended up where she was and the true status of her sanity. I was constantly doubting what was real or not when it came to both her memories and her present day interactions. You just didn't know, and that suspense element was so well done. My only complaint is that I wish the ending had been rounded out a bit more. The big reveal comes right before the end, and I was left feeling like I needed more details to understood how and why it all happened.
I really enjoyed this book. It was unique and the kind of book you don't want to put down. The skill it takes to write a book like this is impressive. I would definitely recommend Unravel if you are looking for something different that will keep your mind engaged and make you question everything you read.
29 of 37 people found the following review helpful.
Ms. Reads BEST NOVEL YET!
By lrut07
FAVE OF 2014!
I had been chomping at the bit to get this little token in my hands, since the title and snippet were released. I was instantly intrigued and knew, just knew, that I was going to love every second of it. And loved it, I did. But it wasn't just the story that had me, it was everything. Every detail, every character, the writing, the flow, the emotions---those emotions ate me up, and most importantly how sucked in and wrapped up in the story that I became. This is a story that has you guessing until the very last page. So needless to say, I was MIND.BLOWN!
It has been close to 24hrs since I finished Unravel and I am still reeling from everything that took place. I feel like I lost a limb once I completed the book. I didn't know what to do with myself. I was a mess. And you know when you are left like a limp noodle, you've read one marvelous book!
I fell hard and fast in love with Naomi, Lana, Lachlan, and Max. I mean how couldn't I? Those characters gave us so much. They handed over their jumbled thoughts, broken hearts, and battered souls for us to consume. I mean that in the best way possible, because they gave us more to understand, to hold on to while learning them and their story. You have to go into this book knowing that you are going to feel everything, I.MEAN.EVERYTHING. And I sort of feel like I lost a piece of my soul to these characters because of how much I felt.
We are introduced to Naomi, who is our MC/Heroin. Her parents are currently jet setting around the globe while she spends the summer with her bestie, Lana and her parents. Lana is very shy and meek, but a bestie who loves Naomi something fierce. These two are tighter than thieves, so you know they've always got each others backs. Lachlan is the boy next door hero, with a few years on Naomi. She looks up to him, in a sense, as a role model/big brother type. But you can sense there is more to how she feels about him as the story thrives. Max is sort of that mysterious sex on a stick hero, who is worth buttloads, and makes every womans mouths water, amongst other things. These four help weave a story for the ages, they show us some dark, spicy, gut wrenching scenes, as we learn what is about to unravel in front of our eyes.
Naomi grabbed a hold of me and never let go. I was living vicariously through her----I became her, and I needed to to see the big picture. She leads us a on thin string throughout the whole story. She shares intimate details into her being. She braves everything, and she does it so earnestly with a fierce passion. She doesn't falter on her journey, she trudges through fighting and forging her way into what she knows. She bares her soul and heart more times than I can count. And those moments are the most captivating and heart stopping moments throughout the whole story. We know who she is, what she wants, and know she is still not fighting the battle she is trying so desperately to. The girl is on a mission, from the very first page, to the very last. This is a mission that you don't want to miss out on. Hold on tight to your ereader/paperback, and be prepared for anything and everything!
When I said Naomi and Lana were as thick as thieves, I meant every word of it. Naomi will do everything within her power to make her bestie smile, laugh, or even to soothe her. These two have each others backs when times are rough and bumpy. And as I said before, Lana is very self-kept, but likes to take a walk on the wild side with Naomi. I loved their bond and easiness with one another. They share something very real and special. There were times when things were hectic or a bit unnerving in the story where I just wanted to rock Lana, and tell her everything would be ok. But Naomi was there to be her rock. Can these two keep their bond while life throws them a curve ball? Or will their relationship crumble?
The men Lachlan and Max, had me ooey gooey and messy throughout the story. They really are the epitome of perfection. Each man has a characteristic that pierced me. It made me fall head over heels in love with both of them. They each carry a part of Naomi, something that they both cherish. You feel the way they want/need Naomi, it isn't desperation, or lust, it is something deeper than that. Something so strong that it could possibly engulf these three. The relationship that Lachlan/Naomi have compared to Max/Naomi is more pure and honest, where as Max/Naomi have strong passion and heat. Like I said, these two men each have their own fire that intrigued me, and had me falling under their spells. But who is the one to be there for Naomi, through rough tides? Who will be her rock when it is needed most?
This whole story had me in knots. I felt like a pretzel. I felt the need to scream, shout, kick, cry, and smile. I needed a release. I struggled not being able to know the answers fast enough. I wanted every piece of the puzzle, whether it landed jagged or completely whole, I had to know what the outcome would be. And once I had the puzzle pieced sharply together, my heart shattered .
Then I felt empty.
And cried tears of pain, sadness, happiness, and everything in between.
I am still replaying the whole story like it is on a movie reel and picking through each reel trying to figure things out, again. I honestly can say I didn't expect this book to eat me alive. I knew, that this was going to be a darker read. One that would have me dangling over an edge, but not one that could push me off that edge. I was rereading passages just so I could make sure I was reading everything correctly. It isn't fast-paced, so to speak, but mildly paced. A LOT HAPPENS! A lot. I am not lying when I say that. You need to keep your eyes and mind peeled the whole time you are reading, so you soak everything up. Because if you blink, you will miss everything!
This book is the reason why I.LOVE.READING.
Be prepared to have the reading experience of a lifetime! Author Calia Read does not disappoint. She throws us to wolves. This is one of those stories that you are going to have a massive book hangover from, one that will stick with you forever! This is Ms. Reads best novel to date. She dove into some deep stuff with this novel, but one that she pieced together perfectly. This is 10+++ Star read for me.
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